Ok With Any Outcome

People continue to ask if we will be able to adopt D at some point. As we learned in our foster care trainings, the number one goal of the process is reunification with the birth parent/s because it helps the children's identity, helps bring healing and wholeness to the parents and family unit. It is difficult sometimes to think of children going back to living in an unsafe, or unloving environment, and of course we pray this will not be the case. But we have also been convicted over the last few years in general that maybe we think too highly of ourselves as parents too, and need to not judge others. Like when we were in Haiti, we saw parents caring for many children that were not their own because their parents were out working, or elsewhere in the village. Only a few of the children wore shoes, their clothing was dirty, we didn't see a lot of interaction in general between parents and children. But here in the US, we have our own sort of neglect with so much technology, schooling and extracurricular commitments, and not giving kids a chance to take on many of the responsibilities forced on children in other countries. So I hope that we will continue to pray that D knows the love of his Heavenly Father, and if possible that it would come through the love of earthly parents, other adults and friends, and not focus on what means of love, discipline, and provisions he will be given.

I have also enjoyed taking D to his visits more than expected this week. I like that I am forced to sit down for at least one hour during the day :), and as sad as I was to feel this at first, I do enjoy the time being able to interact with just my three- even taking just the three of them into a store or park where I don't have to be as nervous about unpredictable behavior.

So all in all, as much as we still would love to get the final ok to make D a permanent member of the family, we are more and more okay with any outcome. It is hard for a lot of people, and even us to believe that we would love, care for, clean up after, (and potty train) someone else's child, with no guarantee that we will get the benefit of what we want- for it to lead to adoption. So I am thankful for this unexpected lesson and sharpening of our faith, in addition to the bigger picture of adoption we hope to display for God's glory.