Here are a few updates from this past (busy) week:
1- No news on D- still waiting to hear back from the state about officially being approved.
Prayer Request- We think he either has a really active imagination, is still really confused, seeking attention, not sure....but one thing to pray for for him is that we don't know how to respond when many many times a day he makes statements that are very obviously not true (My grandma got me this outfit (when he was with me the day before buying it), or "My had pizza for lunch too" (when Josh got back rom a pizza party with his sisters)....Some of these obviously are more harmless than others, and we want to stress how important honesty is, but also want to be sympathetic if he is just not remembering something or is trying to continue to make sense of her life.
2-Joshua:
Court: Last Thursday, we arrived to court ready to start going through the list of "best interest witnesses" (of which, I was supposed to go second), and after the foster worker's first 10 minutes, Josh's mom's attorney asked for a recess, during which she told the judge that his mom was ready to sign away her rights. This was a pretty big change of heart from her last court appearances where she was pretty angry and dug her heels in, and it meant that this trial day and any future trial dates do not have to take place. She and I had multiple positive interactions, during which I assured her that if Josh were to stay with us, she would continue to be spoken of, prayed for, loved for giving him life, and that if she is a healthy person to be around, we are open to as much interaction as we feel is beneficial. We hugged a couple of times and I thanked her for making this hard decision so her kids could have some stability and hopefully she can also have a fresh start.
Telling Joshua: We waited until our Japanese exchange student left for home Sunday morning, and Sunday afternoon talked with our 3 biological children about what happened at court (Judge and mom mutually decided that it would be best for Josh and his sisters not to go back home and live with her). We asked if they would like for us to sign the intent to adopt Joshua too, now that we had the option. They were all very excited and said yes. We then had the same talk with Josh. He gave a thumbs down when we asked how he felt about not being able to live with his mom again, then when we asked if he wanted us to sign the intent to adopt him, he gave a big smile, thumbs up, and hugged us. Then he ran upstairs and cried, "I want my mom" for about 3 minutes. We told him that it's ok to feel sad about losing that chance to return to his mom, and happy to stay with us at the same time, and that he could say or ask anything he wanted.
Good-bye visit: Tuesday, Josh and his sisters met with his mom at a park to say good-bye at least until their adoptions are finalized. His mom invited many relatives, and I was told that he and his sisters were very distraught saying good-bye to all of them as the adults were so upset.
School: After going through almost the entire admissions process for K12 online school so Joshua could be home with the rest of the kids, we just found out today that he is not eligible- DHS said the child had to be over 16 or have some specific needs to do on-line schooling. I am pretty disappointed, but know he will still have a good year.
Next Steps: Next Wednesday I am taking Josh to a pool party with his sisters at their CASA's house (Court Appointed Special Advocate). She has worked with all of the children for 4 years, and is seriously considering adopting Josh's sisters. She thinks it would be best not to move Josh, but we'll talk more in person next week. I know either way, we would have a great relationship going forward. The following day is Josh's youngest sisters official adoption day, and I asked Josh if he would like to go, see what it's like and support his sister (plus, I'm curious). He said it would be weird, but still praying about whether or not to take him.
Prayer for Josh:
- Continuing to deal with the loss of returning home to his mom.
- Potential adoptive families for his sisters
- Wisdom for whether it would be best for Josh to stay with us or go with his sisters if it's an option from their future adoptive home.
- Not feeling left out, starting out another school year at school versus being at home with us.
Thank you for your continued prayers and support, I see every time I write these updates, how much has really been happening, despite most days just feeling like "normal" life :)
Courtney (and family)
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